Joke jokes
Sans: Pap, your spaghetti is bonearific.
PaprUs: Sans, no. Aw, your funny bone is not working; come on, that one was a rib tickler.
What’s pink, rusty, and covered in cobwebs?
Madeline McCann's bike.
Are you a banana...
because I find you a-peeling!
Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school?
He mist.
So, no head?
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
Quit making those progeria jokes. They get old very quickly.
What do you call a chill transgender?
Fictional.
What noise does Sally like to say? Splat!
Will you remember me in 7 years?
(Yes)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
How did you get Sally into a blender?
- Without much resistance.
How do you get Sally out of a blender?
- Tortilla chips.
When does it rain money?
When there's a change in the weather.
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?
Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?
Teacher, the one sucking it?
Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.
A friend of mine told me this joke a long time ago and I have never forgotten it.
A worm was crawling over a train track, and a train ran over him and cut off his ass. The worm turned around to get the piece of his ass back and another train ran over him and cut off his head.
BAD IDEA and a lesson to us all.
NEVER LOSE YOUR HEAD OVER A PIECE OF ASS!! LMAO (literally, kind of)( pretty sure you get it)
What did the leper say to the prostitute?
Keep the tip.
Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, "I'm hit! I think I've lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" asks the other.
"I'm positive!"
What is blue, green, flat, and has teeth?
The Earth, but I lied about the teeth.
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.