Joke jokes
I would tell you a joke about my dink, but it's too long.
What is the difference between a normal joke and a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back.
I went up to a priest and asked if he participated in NNN. He replied, "How can I, with all these people calling me daddy?"
When does it rain money?
When there's a change in the weather.
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
Some dude called me a tool.
So later I got hammered and nailed his girlfriend.
Guess he was right :/
Dark humor is like the plague; everyone was supposed to get it.
Me: Knock knock.
Person: Who's there?
Me: No-one.
Person: No-one who?
Me:...........
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.
Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?
Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!
How did you get Sally into a blender?
- Without much resistance.
How do you get Sally out of a blender?
- Tortilla chips.
Will you remember me in 7 years?
(Yes)
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Sans: Pap, your spaghetti is bonearific.
PaprUs: Sans, no. Aw, your funny bone is not working; come on, that one was a rib tickler.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to Birds Eye.
Are you a banana...
because I find you a-peeling!
Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school?
He mist.
So, no head?
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
Yo mama so old that her breastmilk was powdered. You breastfeed like this π¬π¨.
Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?
Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?
Teacher, the one sucking it?
Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.