Joke jokes

What do you call an emo with no breasts? A cutting board.

What's the difference between an orphan's parents and his boomerang?

One of them actually came back.

What's black and white and read all over?

A newspaper.

What's black, white, black, white, red, white, black, red, black, then red all over?

A penguin falling down the stairs.

Dark humor is like water.

Some people get it, others don't.

Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."

I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"

What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?

A ventriloquist.

I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.

I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.

Your hairline bent like the relationship with your mom and dad.

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas?

I don't know, he still hasn't opened it yet.

9/11 isn't something we should joke about. Some people can remember where they were when they found out. I'll never forget where I was when I found out.

It was 9:37, September 10th, 2001. I was in a cave in Iraq when my friend Mohammad told me.

My favorite kind of face mask is the plastic bag.

Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"

The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."

Me: I saw your parents yesterday.

Orphan girl: Where?

Me: The coffin was still open.

Why is it ok to punch an orphan?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Did you hear the news? Michael Jackson died because he choked on 7-year-old nuts and balls.

Short girl: "How do you see up there?"

Tall guy: "Who said that?"

I spit my drink out and then ran away.

I'd tell a joke about how my mom was abusive, but I either forgot everything, or she just wasn't there.