What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked, and the other doesn't.
Joke Jokes
What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?
Yung Flung Dung.
What's the worst thing you can say to a widow?
"I'm sorry, I just had to."
What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.
What's pink and rusty? Madeline McCann's bike.
What do you call a person with no nose and no body?
Nobody knows.
If an apple and an emo kid fell out of a tree, which would hit the ground first?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.
SAVE ORPHAN JOKES! SAVE THEM!
What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a parakeet?
Shredded tweet!
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
A feather and a depressed boy fell at the same time, which one hits the ground first?
The feather, because the rope stopped the child.
Boy: Will you remember me in a minute?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a day?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Will you remember me in a year?
Mom: Yes.
Boy: Knock knock.
Mom: Who's there?
Boy: Bitch, you forgot me.
What is the difference between a flower and an orphan?
A flower gets picked.
Why can't orphans work at SC Johnson?...
Because it's a FAMILY company.
Where did the school kittens go for their field trip?
To the mew-seum!
I come in from work to see my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride, she says, "BOO!" What kind of a dick fuck does that!
When you think you're depressed, but you know you're probably just using depression to be lazy and self-loathing, but then you realize that it, in itself, might actually be a symptom of depression.
Well gang, it looks like we've got another mystery on our hands!
What did the orphan say to his dad last?
Please get non-fat milk!
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
Why did the orphan fall off the mountain? Because his parents let go.
