Joke jokes

What is the difference between an orphan and a candle?

One is used.

Q: Why was 10 afraid?

A: Because he was always between 9/11.

What does LMAO stand for?

Launching Moms At Orphans.

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Holocaust victim?

Harry made it out of the chamber.

Vegan is actually an old Indian word for "bad hunter."

Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.

What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?

A ventriloquist.

You are so scary that even your hairline ran away.

What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?

Smoking.

What starts with "N" and ends with "G?"

Nothing.

I heard you were looking for a stud. I have the STD, and all I need is U.

Why did Stephen Hawking die? ... Because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep."

I was going to tell you a joke about a pencil, but now it is pointless.

You know when people say a joke about living?

That's because we are all living a joke.

What do you call an autistic kid with orange hair?

A boomerang.

A funny joke:

Knock knock. "Who's there?" Who. "Who who?" Ha, who who, you sound like an owl! "Fuck you!"

My friends told me to stop making suicide jokes, so I hanged on.

What is the same between water and dark jokes?

Not everyone gets it!

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas?

I don't know, he still hasn't opened it yet.

Did you hear the news? Michael Jackson died because he choked on 7-year-old nuts and balls.