Joke jokes
What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
What do you call a FAT Man under 5'9"?
A JUMBO shrimp.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home, LOL.
I hope Stephen Hawking's an organ donor because I need new parts for my go-cart.
What do you call a disabled person who gets high?
Baked potato.
What is the difference between a condom and an orphan?
One of them is used.
The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents, buddy."
Yo, hairline been missing so badly that the police had to put up a wanted poster for it!
I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.
What did one copper say to the other? C U.
So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.
I’m just kidding.
I see you guys have SANS-ational jokes!
Person A: What do you call the dangly bit of an octopus?
Person B: Tentacles?
Person A: Ok *tickles person B ten times*
Q: How can you tell if a vampire is sick?
A: By how much he's coffin.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Carlos.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
If someone calls you dirty minded just say:
"You are dirty minded as well if you understand what I'm saying."
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.