Joke jokes
A dad tells his son, "Stop masturbating! If you do it too long, you will go blind."
The son replied, "Dad, I'm over here!"
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
I would say life's a joke, but I can't, because jokes have a meaning.
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
Why didn't Michael Jackson date 25 year olds?
Because there were only 20 of them.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite drink? Tea-hee-hee!
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
What do you call a cow in the snow?
Chilli Beef.
What Costco food is associated with Michael Joseph Jackson?
The Jackson dog. It's 49-year-old sausage between 6-year-old buns.
Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony?
He wanted to clean out the blanket.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?
One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.
What's the difference between an orphan and a vegetable?
The vegetable gets picked.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.
I’m not saying my life’s a joke. I’m saying it’s the punchline no one asked for.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.
How do you know if there's a vegan in the room?
Wait 2 minutes and they'll tell you.
What do you say to a girl with two black eyes?
Nothing, you told her twice.