Joke jokes
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
I pushed the kid in a wheelchair into fire... I called him "HOT WHEELS".
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humor?
Because it can't hit home.
What do you call Stephen Hawking in a burning building?
Hot Wheels.
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would just crash and burn.
What's an orphan's favorite part of a website?
The homepage.
Why'd the orphan cross the road? He was told his parents were on the other side.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
Dad: Hey son, wanna hear a joke?
Son: Sure thing, dad!
Dad: Your mother and I are getting a divorce. She found out that I was sleeping with the neighbor's dog!
Son: I don't get the joke, dad.
Dad: It's my life, son! My life is the joke.
How many children does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Not 27, because my basement is still dark.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.
REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.
I named my dog "5 miles" so I could say I ran five miles today. I ran over 5 miles.
I was thinking of a good accident joke, and I asked my sister. She said, "you."
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)
What's the difference between a blonde and a car door? The harder you slam the blonde, the looser it gets.
There is a feminist group in my town.
It is called Gal-Qaeda.
(I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)