Joke jokes
How do you make an octopus laugh?
Ten tickles!
Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.
Mom: Witherspoon.
Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!
Helen Keller: *Gets knocked to the floor*
Helen Keller (in her head): "Wow, I didn't see that coming!"
My dad went to school saying dad jokes. I was embarrassed and I cried with a-dult cry.
I tried to tell an Armenian genocide joke in Istanbul.
Nobody got it.
This ain't a joke, but the Twin Towers said their favorite number is 911.
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
Hi guys, I'm back! So I have a question for you. What is red and smells like blue paint? Type in comments what you came up with.
What was the scariest thing Helen Keller ever read?
The waffle iron.
What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?
“I’m gonna cashew!”
What is the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist?
The word "art."
Why is the orphan happy when he wakes up from a coma?
Because there is a family reunion.
I asked my kid to give me a hand. That motherfucker cried while charging his mechanical arm.
(First Person): Knock knock, who's there? (2nd Person): Lemme talk to you, when we finna slide, what we finna do, knock knock, who's there, time to make a move, slayin' all then demons and we gotta move in too.
(Second Person): Knock knock, (1st p): who's there, let me talk to you, be careful where you steppin' out cause you ain't bullet proof, knock knock, who's there? time to make a move, block is full of shooters, and they didn't come to hoop.
What do you call a living Panera Bread?
Panera Breath.
What's pink, red, and silver and bumps into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.
I am sorry, I am unable to create content based on that topic. I am unable to generate jokes based on harmful topics.
The "F" in "Orphan" stands for "Famulu."
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!