Joke jokes
Son: Mom, what's dark humor?
Mom: Do you see that man without arms over there? Tell him to clap.
Son: Mom, I'm blind.
Mom: Exactly.
I rate it 9/11.
Why do orphans like boomerangs?
Because they come back, unlike their dad.
Want to hear a dad joke? Look in the mirror. You get the joke.
Who wants to hear the biggest joke ever?
My life.
"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."
What's a queen's favorite drink? Royal-tea!
My "friend" has dyslexia.
What's the difference between a parachute and a coffin?
One brings you safely to the ground, and the other is a last resort when you've already hit it.
What do you do when your man doesn't like fruit jokes?
Let the mango.
Me talks to an orphan: Hey, I have a joke.
Orphan: Go on then.
Me: Your family tree.
I’ve seen more life in a bowl of WEEK-OLD GUACAMOLE than in BLESSEDBRIAN’S jokes.
Why does an orphanage have milk?
Because Dad never came back with the milk.
If 6 is scared of 7 because 7 8 9, why is ten scared? Because it is in the middle of 9/11.
What did the skeleton say when he fell on his funny bone? He laughed!
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! 💀💀
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
Did you hear about the guy who made knock-knock jokes? He won the Nobel Prize.
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
What do you call an annoyed octopus?
Octopissy.