Joke jokes
People joke about 9/11, but it's not funny. My dad died in 9/11. Best pilot in Saudi Arabia.
How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Well, there are 69 in my basement, and it's still dark.
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a bar. The bartender told them there was a magic mirror in the bathroom. He said that if you spoke the truth in front of the mirror, you would have your greatest desires, but if you told a lie, you would disappear.
The redhead said that she was the prettiest girl in the bar, and she walked out of the bathroom, and she got a thousand dollars. The brunette walked in and said she was the smartest one in the bar. She walked out of the bar with a new car. The blonde went in, she said, "I think..." poof, she was gone.
When my friend says I suck at something, I'm like, "U swallow."
What's the difference between a pope/preacher and acne?
Acne comes on your face when you're 13.
This is a Rickroll. The joke is that you thought you were going to get something else, but instead you got Rickrolled.
Why did Sally drown in the pool?
She had no arms, remember.
Where does Caesar keep his armies?
Up his sleavies.
I don't like these Undertale jokes. They just don't make any sense.
What do you call a pig who knows karate?
A pork chop.
What did one tree say to the tree that was a bully? "LEAF me alone."
Police: Where do you live? Blonde: With my parents. Police: Where do your parents live? Blonde: With me. Police: Where do you all live? Blonde: Together. Police: Where is your house? Blonde: Next to my neighbor's house. Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Blonde: If I tell you, you won't believe me. Police: Tell me. Blonde: Next to my house.
Q: Why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: Because they were a racquet!
What is it called if your mom does not make it to your birth?...
An abortion.
The joke is me.
Why does air not come down? I think gravity didn't like the Facebook page of air.
What do you call a magic owl? Hoo-dini.
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"