Joke jokes
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?
That's okay. There is really no point to it.
Why can't bugs drive... because they don't have a LICE-ens...
BA-DUM CHHH!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting Cow.
Interrupting Co- MOO!
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He didn't have the guts.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde girl?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
What's the grossest thing ever?
A bag of dead babies.
What's even more gross?
The bottom one is still wriggling!
Why did the child cross the road?
To get to the church.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.
I heard a joke about heavy metal earlier. It was pretty ironic.
What do you get when you cross a belt and a watch?
A waist of time.
If sex with three people is called a "threesome" and sex with two people is called a "twosome," then I know why people call you handsome!
Question: How did the cat cross the river?
Answer: It didn’t, it drowned.
What did the cat say when she stubbed her toe?
"(Me)owwww!"
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.
What's the difference between that bridge and my will to live? None, they're both too short.
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.
What is the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
I take off my boots when I jump on a trampoline.
What do you call a boy in your mom?
Your dad.
What do you call a butt that kills people?
An ASSassin :)
Why did Sally cross the road?
She didn’t wear her seatbelt.