Joke jokes

59009 flip it backwards on your calculator... it = boobs!

My people are starving. Stop Africa jokes. Not funny >:(

Two men walk into a bar. You’d think at least one of them would have ducked.

Does your shoe have a hole in it?

No.

Then how did you put your foot in it?

MAN 1) Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?

MAN 2) No.

MAN 1) Neither did he.

What's sad and has no life? The person reading this.

Sugar Honey Ice Tea.

I FORGOT MY JOKE!

What's the difference between cancer and me?

My dad didn't beat cancer... Whelp, I guess I stole that one.

The cat ran across the road when the car swerved. It killed a bear that killed a dog that killed a squirrel that killed a nut. The cat survived it all. The cat killed the squirrel and the bear with the car...

The cat still died, why?

It had a Catastrophic Catcident.

What did Connor Lys Clark say to Karl Kassulke? "I love bridges!"

What is red and green and goes 100 miles per hour?

A frog in a blender.

Why did the orphan run into the street? To get to the other side of life.

If I had a sister with only 1 leg... wouldn't her name be I-Lean?

what do you call a lazy gay?

someone who comes straight out of the closet, and goes straight to the couch.

You are a joke.

I have so many cash machine jokes.

But none of them seem to work ATM.

So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. "My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane," and his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?" The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."

What did Stephen Hawking get for his B-Day?

Chocolate arm.

R.I.P. boiled water. You will be mist.

"Doctor, there's a patient on line 1 that says he's invisible."

"Well, tell him I can't see him right now."