Why did the ducks go to jail?
They sold quack.
Lucaâs Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. đ¤Ł
Why don't orphan criminals go to jail?
Because they weren't even wanted.
I donât know why Iâm in jail. So, basically, I was at a gun range, and we were supposed to hit the targets, even though I hit it.
Lil Johnny looked in his pants and couldnât find his fish, so he started to yell out, "Lil fishy, lil fishy, lil fishy!" They called child support and sent the parents to jail for putting a fish up a childâs butt.
If you give a prostitute money, you will go to jail, but if you give a prostitute a Klondike bar, you will not go to jail. I would rather go to the casino and get more money for my buck.
What's the difference between a baby and a salad? I'm not in jail for tossing a salad.
Jorden CalerendiĂĄ.
I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.
You hear about Rapboats' time in prison? He kept droppin' the soap on purpose.
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! đđđđđđđđđ
What's up guys! Quandale Dingle here (RUUEHEHEHEHEHEEHE). I have been arrested for multiple crimes (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH) including: Battery on a police officer (WHAT), Grand theft, Declaring war on Italy, and public indecency (RUHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE x2 speed).
I will be escaping prison on, MARCH 28TH! After that I will take over the worl[d].
A 6-year-old girl decides to get baptized. She walks into the water of the river. Unfortunately, the pastor was drunk. The pastor put her in the water and dunked her under. The drunken man then forgot to bring her up from the water. The poor girl drowned and died...
Later on, when the pastor was better and thrown in jail, all he had to say to the mortified family was, âWell, at least sheâs in heaven!â
What do you call an Indian eating cows? Mooove to jail.
Why am I in jail?
All I did was cause 9/11.
Why am I in jail? Because I wasn't invited to the party in the orphanage 23 days ago. Stupid fucks.
Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great, either.
Did you hear about the bank robber?
Turns out he got shot by the police
And he wound up in prison
Trump can get banned. The cops can tack him to jail, and Trump go go go go bye bye for good. Trump is meing.
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.
So, three guys are walking down the street together and decide to go rob a bank.
The first one goes for the richest man in the cityâs vault but canât open it easily and is caught and sent to death in jail for robbing the richest man.
The second one goes for his uncle's vault because screw that son of a b***h; heâs rich, why does he need all the money? But his uncle was unfortunately at the vault that day and snapped his nephew's neck.
The third one went for his exâs vault and thought, âWell, that b***h can suck my d**k; sheâs so poor anyway, who would care if I take all her money so she dies of hunger and dehydration and homelessness?â So he managed to get into her vault easily because it wasnât heavily locked and took all her money. The next day, the third guy's ex showed up to his house and said, âIâm gonna f*****g murder you,â so she shot him dead and got her money from his house.
In hell, the three guys see each other and explain what happened. The third guy did and then asked, âYou know, I donât get it. If the richest guys are heavily guarded but already have so much money in their house, why does it need to be heavily guarded? I donât understand why the poorer arenât heavily guarded when they are so poor they need the money.â And the first guy said, âB***h, I donât know, maybe the bank tellers think poor people should suck it and just die already.â
