Jail jokes
Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"
Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."
Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."
Guy: "About that..."
What’s the difference between jail and my basement?
Some people are let out of jail.
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS?
If you stop giving money to a church, you won't go to prison.
Some people think "prison" is one word, but to robbers, it's a whole sentence.
Memes
What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.
A prisoner was told how he'll be executed. Needless to say, he was shocked.
What did the pedophile say when he got out of prison?
I feel like a kid again.
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.
Why did Yoda go to jail for rape?
He doesn't get consent; he just uses the force.
What is a prisoner's favorite punctuation?
A period.
Why?
Because it marks the end of a sentence.
How do you escape a French prison?
Yell angrily in German!
I was blessed with a 9 inch penis.
The priest is in jail now.
My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.
What's the hardest thing about being a rapist?
My dick.
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
Why do orphans wanna be a criminal?
So that they can be wanted.
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.
What did the cop say after he shot the ginger?
"I guess orange is the new black."
I was blessed with a 9-inch dick. Fair to say that priest is in jail now.