it's jokes
I was thinking of starting up a stair company, but there were too many steps to it.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection.
At one point, she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, "Eric Harris." It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke, look up "Eric Harris natural selection."
President: Them damn flat faced n**g*rs!!
Man: We have the power of the sun itself!
President: Drop it on them!
Man: You push the button.
President: *sigh* Fine give it to me.
Man: Hands over button
President: Pushes it
Both: YAAA!
President: Bumps into the button pressing it again
Both: Oh, sh*t!
Meanwhile in Japan after the first bomb went off
Japanese man: Ah sh*t here we go again
Why can't you buy an iPhone X?
It's too expensive.
One day I had the munchies, so I ate a clock. It was very... time consuming.
I saw a bear eating a duck.
It was unBEARable.
How many Senators fans does it take to change a light bulb?
All 3 of them.
Hockey for life!
One day an orphan threw a boomerang, but it came back, just like its parents.
Anonymous 1: Why are you crying?
Anonymous 2: No, buddy, come to my finral.
I didn't steal it. 🌚
How do you get rid of a fat ghost? You exercise it.
It may be weird to let people smell your hair, but grab the phone as soon as the dwarf says your hair smells nice.
Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!
Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!
Lenda: I'll try!
3 mins later.
Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!
Lenda: Then what is 90 million?
Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!
4 mins later.
Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?
Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!
Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!
Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?
Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!
You are so fat Bob the Builder said, "I can't fix it!" LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.
Gwen: Bastard, dummy, and is the dang ding one who started this, because of you Gwen I am now bullied! It's not the unknown will it is a lot but mostly you! AND ANNOYING YOU SHALL BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO WONDER EVERYONE HATES YOU!
Best, Tenya!
Once upon a time, a donkey was in the jungle. Suddenly, he found a lion costume and then wore it. Then he walked around the forest, and every animal was scared of him. Then he got to the city, and every human was away from him. He was chasing them when he was chasing his owner. He brayed, and then they figured out that this was not a real lion, and then he told everybody about it. Then he berated his donkey.
I was doing a magic show. I tried to make a bunny disappear, but it didn’t work.
I walked outside in shame. I looked up and realised the towers had disappeared!!!!
What has 2 or 3 hands and is always right twice a day when it is broken?
A clock.
Will Smith's slap was like 9/11. It came in unexpectedly and will go down in history.
One day I was going home, and 7 married men came to me and said, "You should be proud of your sister." I asked why. They told me it was the best that they ever had, and we got your sister a trophy.
So I went home, my sister said, "Look at my trophy I earned." The trophy said "The Best Blow Jobs." As a bro, I couldn’t be more prouder.