it's jokes

What’s the difference between a dog and a marine biologist?

One wags its tail, and the other tags a whale!

The twin towers were just tryna take after the leaning tower of Pisa, but they lost their balance and fucked it up.

How many orphans does it take to screw a light bulb in there house?

None because they don't have a home.

This is my fidget spinner, I got it in my Easter basket.

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.

Me: What's that sound?

Ex: What?

Me: Oh, it's the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!

I heard that Uranus is pronounced "yuuranus," but it reminded me of urine! 😆

I made a 3D game about a depressed, self-harming goth. It's mostly unskippable cutscenes.

So a woman was paranoid, so she had a dog to check to see if anything was wrong. She would always stick her hand under the bed, and if the dog licked her hand, then she was safe. One night, just before bed, she stuck her hand under the bed. She felt a lick, so she went to bed. In the middle of the night, she needed to go to the bathroom. So, she walked into the bathroom, and on the window, it said: "HUMANS CAN LICK TOO!" Then she was murdered.

A joke: my life, hahahahaha! Wait, it's not funny.

Did you hear the scores of the African basketball game?

It was Eight-Nothing.

I bought a sweater and it started building up static electricity.

So I got another one free of charge.

It's all fun and games until someone fails at becoming Superman.

I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.

Tell someone to say "alpha" and then "kenny one". Tell them to say it very fast. Tell them it sounded like they said, "I'll fuck anyone!"

How are a gay guy and a refrigerator different?

When you pull the meat out of the refrigerator, it doesn’t fart.

What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!

After 12, it's lunch. 😂

It was a blast to visit the Twin Towers on 9/11 at exactly 8:46 a.m. It was the bomb... like, literally!

Your forehead is so big that it made Mona Lisa smile.