it's jokes
I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!
My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.
He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"
She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."
Why don’t you get a book about how to commit suicide?
Because you won’t bring it back afterwards.
When you step on the scales, it says "to be confined."
How do you stop a dog from humping your leg?
Suck its cock.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
It’s the only time they’re ever wanted.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
How do people grade pedophiles?
1st grade to 8th grade.
(I know it's orphan jokes but still)
Why did the Titanic sink? Because it saw an iceberg selling candy.
I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.
What would they do? Go to their family?
Why did the Titanic sink? It's because they didn't want the icebergs' candy.
I made Google Earth for orphan kids.
Sadly, it does not show where home is.
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
Papyrus: Nyhe heh heh! I got a swim suit! And it even says cool dude!
Sans: I guess now it says pool dude ;)
Papyrus: SSSSAAAAANNNNSSSS!
Don’t you hate it when your teacher(s) say, “just focus, it’s that easy?”
And then you die inside.
What time is it when you get a chance to take a car and drive all over?
Time to get in trouble!
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
I was going to tell you a joke about a pencil, but now it is pointless.