Intelligence jokes
You're so dumb that every time you use the bathroom, you use your shoe to wipe your ass.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
Say "beans" fast three times.
Now you’re an idiot.
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
How do you make a blond snowman? You can't, you have to hollow out the head.
What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
He’s not dead, just his storage unit.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
Yo mama so stupid... she stared at an orange juice carton because it said, "CONCENTRATE!"
Yo daddy so stupid, he went to the HO-tel to see some hoes.
A redhead, a dark-haired woman, and a blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun!
The blonde states, "I agree, let's leave at night!"
Yo mama so stupid, she told the police a kid raped her.
Yo momma so dumb, the doctor wanted to give her a blood transfusion but she said no because she thought it would turn her trans.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought a jigsaw meant dancing with a saw!
Your mama is so stupid that when she heard drinks were on the house, she grabbed a ladder.
Q: How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?
A: All your homework and the Rubik's cube you spent a year on and still can’t solve is solved. 🤓🤓🤓🤓
It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
Yo mamma is so stupid, she returned a donut because it had a hole in it.
What do you call an autistic army special forces?
I said something in your ear, and then it echoed because of the size of your forehead because your brain [is] small.