INS jokes
Why are school shootings branded “very American”?
1. They usually happen in the USA.
2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.
How do you plan a party in space? You have to planet.
My sister got mad when I told her to say this word 10 times, and she got in trouble, and it was a funny word that she did not even know what she was saying, ahhahaha! 😆 lol
Why does Helen Keller look in the toilet after taking a poop?
Nobody knows!
What name is easy to say in Spanish?
Marissa!
POV: fishing in the city
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb?
I'll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", and then put you in the oven for the bitch and me!
African Kid: "Mom, can we have water?"
Mom: "Sure, it's in the house."
African Kid: *Goes to the fridge and opens the door searching for cold water*
The fridge: ERROR 404 Water Not Found
Why do fat cows eat fat cows? Because I wrote this in America.
What do kids with cancer and cancer jokes have in common?
CANCER!
Just kidding, they are both fun to laugh at.
When you're going to Titanic: It's the best ship in the world.
When you know it's sinking: It's the poor ship!
Steven Hawking's Sesh Cave, entry 50p, guaranteed Budweiser and ecstasy. Maybe a gram of heroin. You'll most likely see a mental 90-year-old guy absolutely going mental on the dance floor with a Stella in one hand and another on his crotch.
We are gonna crush you in the try not to laugh.
Q: You have problems, I think your disease is BOOFA.
Q: What boofa?
A: Boofa deez nuts in yo mouth!
I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.
What do you call a homosexual in a coma?
A fruit and a vegetable!
What's black and white and red all over????? A zebra in a blender!
What do Chinese people order: noodles in bed with some fried cat?
Why were the people in the Twin Towers mad? They wanted a drive-through pepperoni pizza, but got a fly-through plane instead.