INS jokes
What does a sad cowboy and a supernatural fan have in common?
Both want to put a Winchester in their mouth.
Having sex in an elevator is wrong. On so many levels.
Okay class, who can tell me who the fastest readers are?
The pilots of 9/11 went through the Twin Towers, 6 in 3 seconds.
I put a pipe bomb in an orphanage. 🤡🤡
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
Friend: What are you doing?
Me: Putting peanut butter on my balls.
Friend hears in the distance, "Orphans, I have food for you!"
Just a pickup line.
"Ayo, bbg, are you Maria? 'Cause you can sure as hell count ME in."
When you’re in India and you start hearing a tick, tick, tick, tick, you run!
What is 8 divided by 2?
Answer: 3 (you cut 8 in half).
Who would win in a race, Stephen Hawking or a turtle?
The turtle, because it can walk.
My dad was in the plane in 9/11, and he was the smart one that convinced everyone. He said, "We're fucked."
What do Batman and a Black man have in common?
Answer: They can't go anywhere without Robin.
F*ck in' the poo.
Why did my dad bring a bomb vest to fit in with his Taliban brothers?
What happens when you work in the Twin Towers? It connects to airplane WiFi.
Don't hate life, love it because when you want to live and try again in life, it's already too late. :(
Guys, my girlfriend calls me: "911, help! There’s a strange man in my room and I think he’s on drugs!"
She’s so nice.
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
What happens when you kick a boy in the balls?
THEY NUTS ARE IN PAIN.
Q: Why did Stevie Wonder drown?
A: Because there wasn't a lifeguard in sight.