INS jokes
Mom: You can't die in the living room, David, so you can stop stabbing and shooting yourself.
David: I will surpass Kakarot!
Jordan: *dead on the living room floor*
Why did the golfer change his pants? In case he got a hole in one!
"MERCURY INSURANCE, come to our office in Mercury."
A blonde crashes an airplane.
Officer: Could you please explain to me what happened?
Woman: It got so cold in the plane, I turned the fan off.
Officer: *face palms self*
Also officer: Here's your sign.
What’s the difference between a pile of babies and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What is the difference between human rights and the rights of a human being in?
Hi 👋 I love 💕 you walk in and out oon.
Hi 👋 I love 💗 you walk in and out the door 🚪 night. I did not have time today. I was just a little bit and I had to walk home from home after dinner. I
Girl lol feel dick in mouth on you.
What's the smallest stick in the world?
Your man's dick.
Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a soda can?
He was lucky it was a soft drink!
When you have a box of dead babies in your garage and one of them is alive at the bottom and has to eat its way out but goes back for seconds.
How do you make a tissue dance?
You put a little boogie in it.
How do you stop a baby from crawling on the floor?
Nail one hand to the ground...
How do you stop it from crawling in circles? Nail the other hand to the floor.
Skeletons love to be in band. They love the trombone!
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 7 seconds.
Robyn Olive in 10.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock." "Knock, knock who?" "Can you let me in now?"
What language do they speak in the middle of the earth?
CORE-ean
Why can’t you run in a campground?
Because it’s past tents.