INS jokes
Why are there no fat people in Japan?
Last time they had a "Fat Man," 80,000 people died.
What are the odds of you being in a relationship that is going on in the next few months?
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
They both get turned on by kids.
What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? Family, but there's no "f".
Who was the meanest man in the world?
He raped Helen Keller and threw her down a well, but not before cutting off her fingers so she couldn't yell for help.
I don't wanna brag, but I finished a puzzle in under a week, and it said 2-4 years on the box.
What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?
Dead.
I threw a boomerang years ago. Now I live in constant fear.
What do you call a kid that's in the fire? Hot Wheels.
My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.
I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.
How did the villagers identify the masked rapist?
He was the only one in the village who believed the victim.
In the Bible, it says Jesus died for our sins, but he came back to life, so what did he sacrifice?
Was it a weekend to wash away our sins?
Why don't a gun and an orphan have anything in common? The gun is actually useful.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
What do an orphan and a blind person have in common? They both can't see their parents.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
What do blondes and beer bottles have in common? They are both empty from the neck up.
How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than 40 because my basement is still dark.
The other day, my best friend flipped off the table in class. I thought it was flipping amazing!
I caught my mom licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that?" She replied, "I’m doing it for practice for who could suck the best dick contest in the neighborhood."