INS jokes
Why did the Octopus go down the toilet?
Because he had a toilet call in the drain.
What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?
Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.
What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?
One won't let you down, while the other will.
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.
Your hairline is so far back I learned about it in history class.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Infinite because feminists can't solve problems.
Uma Thurman in "Pulp Fiction" was very kind and possibly the sweetest character, unless you count her forehead as of now.
I wanted to play as Kobe in my console, but the game crashed.
My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.
Why are there 25 letters in the alphabet? Because the D is in U.
Why does Mao Zedong like the east coast?
Because there is a red Sun in the sky.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you should never turn your back on family.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun.
Jack got mad and kicked Jill in the ass because she couldn't make him cum.
What part is usually missing in an orphan’s computer system?
Motherboard.
The first ever joke:
https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/52b8feb0514efb2cbf8ca375/what-is-the-second-hardest-thing-in-the-morning?
My friend that was in a wheelchair was getting bullied, so I said, "Stand up for yourself."
What do they use in communion when they run out of bread?
Doughnuts, because they're holy.
The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?
Because they were lost in the BEATS.