INS jokes
My great uncle died in a concentration camp.
He fell off one of the guard towers.
What do you call Joe from Family Guy in an electric wheelchair?
RoboCop.
Me: Good night, everyone.
My friends and family: Night.
Me: *gets in coffin*
My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?
My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.
Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?
The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they are all crying in a dark corner.
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Why can't an orphan make a home run in baseball?
Because they have no home to go to.
You're so bald, the reflection off your head is blinding people in India.
What do emos and bats have in common? The both hang.
Yo momma so fat that she was used as a tank in Putin's war.
Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
Yo mamma is so stupid, she returned a donut because it had a hole in it.
You are so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection walked away.
I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
I always park in handicapped spaces at the hospital.
Just to test their patients.