If jokes

If her age is on the clock, she can sit on my cock.

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

"It's not a war crime if you win the war."

- Sun Tzu, The Art of War

People ask me if my friend jumps off a bridge, will I go as well? Of course not. I am a leader; I will go first, my friend will jump after me!

If Asriel were Sans, would his theme be "Jokes and Memes"?

Like and comment if you play Fortnite!

Girlfriend: "Would you still love me if I was a figment of your imagination?"

My schizophrenic ass: Of course I would.

If ugliness was a brick, you would be the Great Wall of China.

How is sex like a game of bridge?

If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.

If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.

If you're bored, just go hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

My friend said an apple a day keeps the orphan away. I said only if you throw it hard enough.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be bagels.

My mom: If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?

Me: No.

Attack on Titan music starts playing in my head.

If you’re bored, go punch an orphan. What are the parents gonna do?

If Shaquille O’Neal had a boat, he would’ve named it Freethrow, because he will never sink it.

If you're American when you go in the bathroom and you're American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?

European.

Why did the orphan go to the playground?

To see if it could find its parents.

I asked the orphan if he wanted to watch all the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies with me, and he started crying.

By the way, infertility is hereditary:

If your parents did not have children, you will not have any.