Identity jokes
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
Why do you call a man that is physically handicapped and German?
A physically handicapped bisexual man that is promiscuous and German.
A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.
Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself," she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
Why do heterosexual men like to receive an anonymous blowjob at an adult bookstore? Because they don't want gay men and bisexual men in the LGBT community to find out that they also like getting their cocks sucked by men, but they don't want gay and bisexual men in the LGBT community to find out.
What do you call a lost Indian woman? Ms. Singh.
Isn't it strange that the LGBTQ flag only has straight lines?
How do you find out if your kid is gay?
Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.
what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
a family photo.
Any game: "Are you a boy or a girl?"
Non-binary people: *cries*
Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.
BTW, I am one, wahahaa!
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
I made it, DON'T COPY!!!
What do you call an Irish lesbian? A gay lick.
I'm so depressed that when I smile, my Face ID doesn't recognize me.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: They have nobody to call daddy.
"Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" "It's Dave!"
"Dave who?"
Dave bursts into tears, realizing that his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.
So, a guy is evading the draft. The cops bang on his door, and he runs out the back, through an alleyway onto a road. He finds a nun and asks if he can hide under her blouse. She complies, and the cops walk by and don't see them. The man comes back up from under the nun's blouse and says, "Hey man, you've got a pair of balls!" The nun says, "I didn't wanna be drafted either..."
I would name my daughter Awesome so I can tell people that I'm fucking awesome.
I identify as Michael Jackson, and my pronouns are he he.
I like my men how I like my coffee...
WITHOUT A FUCKING VAGINA!
I saw a kid on the side of the road covered in rags and asked if he was an orphan. He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."