What’s the similarity between peas from Tesco and emos?
They both have barcodes.
Got into a fight last night. We both had blades. He cut me deep. I thought I was gone, but he forgot to keep the water running.
Weird thing was that we were in the fight of our lives in the restroom and that guy kinda looked like me.
What do you call a single bisexual?
All bi myself.
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car?
- Carlos.
Mexican jokes and black jokes are pretty much the same.
Once you've heard Juan, you've heard Jamal.
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.
Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
A man walks up to a priest. The man says, "I am Jesus Christ." The priest says, "No, you are not my son." The man says, "Follow me." The man walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Jesus Christ, you're back!"
I'm made with depression and extra anxiety, then a side of gay and a sprinkle of emo.
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."
Me: tries to scan self at Walmart. I can't scan myself, wanna know why?
Alfred: Why?
Me: because I'm worthless... =)
Genders are like the twin towers. There used to be two, but now it's just a sensitive subject.
In my mother's generation, they grew up with Wonder Woman. In ours, we have to wonder if she's a woman.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
"what's that on your wrist?"
"I'm a cutting board. duh"