Identity jokes

Hi, I'm Madison, but for short you can call me Alex.

Once a mustang, always a mustang. - Mr. Shaw

Why can't gay people have hairlines? Because it's not straight.

So, there was this kid, and he went to a store and said to a person there, "I'm emo." Then the person told the emo, "Why the hell are you here? Shouldn't you be hanging in a tree somewhere?"

Why can't orphans be gay? Because then they would be home-osexual.

Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong-king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said, "I am Chong-king." I said I know your name is Chong-king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.

Anyone know what happened?

What do you call Mordecai dressing up as a basketball player?

Blue Jay Simpson!

So one day, I took a trip to Russia and saw Vladimir Putin walking in the streets without any bodyguards. Seeing as how I looked just like him, we switched places for a few days.

After two days, some officer came up to me and asked if we were going to project блять, and I said yes, and the officer said, "God help us."

So a day later, I heard on the news that every other continent and the moon were destroyed. I then approached the officer and said, "I thought you meant we were having a giant orgy." He said, "We did, and that we were extremely drunk."

Did you hear that Michael Jackson changed his name from Michael Smith? Well, at least he's honest.

"We are trans. We are Gay. We are lesbian. We are Bi."

We Do Not Care.

I wish the grass in my backyard was emo so it would cut itself.

What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.

What do you call a man with no body and no nose?

No Body Knows.

No body nose.

Like if you know someone is emo and comment "emo🇷🇺."

Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?

So he could wake up inside.

What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?

Non-buy dairy.

What's brown and hairy? A bear.

What's brown, hairy, and is in love with Ethan Herbst? Arij.

Boy: The principal is so dumb!

Girl: Do you know who I am?

Boy: No...

Girl: I am the principal's daughter!

Boy: Do you know who I am?

Girl: No...

Boy: Good! *Walks away*

I threw a gay person into a fire. Now we call him LGBBQ.

Normal person: "I'm perfect!"

Goth person: "Nobody is."