Humor
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
Why were the 1800s so crazy?
Because of Hairriet Tubman.
I only made so it's the 69th in the hair category.
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."
I am going to scream, this is a cry for help.
#NoMoreOrphanJokes
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
What did the penis say to its pee?
"Urine."
People are making end of the world jokes, like there's no tomorrow.
I guess that corn is a-maize-ing.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Whenever I have diarrhea, my roommate gets constipated.
When I told him this, he said, "Are you kidding me?"
I said, "I shit you not."
There once was a little girl named Sarah with no arms and legs.
*knock knock*
Who's there!
Not Sarah.
If Canadians speak "English Eh?", do Americans speak "English B?"
I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible.
There was a kid named Buttitches, and his teacher was taking attendance. Then the teacher asked, "What is your name?" And he answered, "Buttitches." Then the teacher asked again, "What's your name?" and he replied, "Buttitches." Then a student yelled out, "JUST SCRATCH YOUR ASS ALREADY!"
What gets hard when tugged and fits perfectly in between boobs... A seatbelt.
What does a dyslexic zombie eat? Brian's, hahahahaha!
My friend in a wheelchair tells a funny joke.
I resist the urge to say that he should become a stand-up comedian.
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.