Garbage jokes
My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?
One baby in three trashcans.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. When I'm taking out the trash, I remember you.
What's worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?
- One dead baby in five garbage cans.
What gets louder as it gets smaller?
A baby in a trash compactor.
The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.
So I treat everyone like garbage.
I'm still not sure how I'm not in jail or have been fined for littering. When I was born, I was born in a hospital trash can, therefore making me a literal piece of trash. That being said, any time I'm out in public, I'm a piece of litter.
What's the difference between humans and trash cans? One's actually useful.
What’s pink, black and has 17 nipples?
A trash can behind the cancer ward.
One day my mom told me to take out the trash, and I did. The next day, mom asked me, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "A garbage truck took her." Mom started running to try and get the truck before it left.
What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?
They wait to be filled with a big load.
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
Guess what? I have a baby in ten trashcans.
what's worse than a baby in a trash can? A baby in two trash cans.
What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?”
Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.
Ok, so my brother made this, here it is:
Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken garbage!
Ok I know it makes no sense, but he made it when he was like 3.
I went to the dump truck today, and my wife said, "Thanks for visiting."
What's worse than a baby in a dumpster?
A baby in two dumpsters.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
I would roast you, but I'm not supposed to burn trash.