Garbage jokes

My mom told me to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

What's worse than 3 babies in one trashcan?

One baby in three trashcans.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. When I'm taking out the trash, I remember you.

What's worse than five dead babies in one garbage can?

- One dead baby in five garbage cans.

What gets louder as it gets smaller?

A baby in a trash compactor.

The bible says to love your neighbors as you love yourself.

So I treat everyone like garbage.

I'm still not sure how I'm not in jail or have been fined for littering. When I was born, I was born in a hospital trash can, therefore making me a literal piece of trash. That being said, any time I'm out in public, I'm a piece of litter.

What's the difference between humans and trash cans? One's actually useful.

What’s pink, black and has 17 nipples?

A trash can behind the cancer ward.

What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?

They wait to be filled with a big load.

One day my mom told me to take out the trash, and I did. The next day, mom asked me, "Where is your sister?" and I said, "A garbage truck took her." Mom started running to try and get the truck before it left.

Guess what? I have a baby in ten trashcans.

What do orphans and garbage have in common?

They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.

what's worse than a baby in a trash can? A baby in two trash cans.

Ok, so my brother made this, here it is:

Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken garbage!

Ok I know it makes no sense, but he made it when he was like 3.

What’s the definition of “perfect pitch?”

Throwing a viola into the dumpster without hitting the rim.

I went to the dump truck today, and my wife said, "Thanks for visiting."

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster?

A baby in two dumpsters.

Me: Hi Jacob!

Jacob: Hi.

Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!

Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH

I would roast you, but I'm not supposed to burn trash.