Humor

Tell an old person to pretend [they are] shaking salt in their mouth... you'll see!

Here’s another joke my friend told me.

What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.

Why was the kid's report card all wet?

Because it was below "sea" level.

What do you call a deer who is funny?

Diraleous.

What is the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

Hey guys, how was your day?

If you ask me the same question, here's the answer: depressing.

I still haven't made any friends on this app. All I do is read and comment on old jokes or opinions.

KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."

What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?

One of them is a domesticated pet.

Nearly 40% of the world have been in a relationship; the 60% are worstjokesever.com users.

What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?

Special forces.

My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat

Why do orphans play GTA so much?

Because they can be wanted for once.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.

Russia—the real joke.

My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.

ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG

Give me freedom. Give me fire. Give me contract, Or I retire.

Jog all day, Out of UCL now. FC Barcelona, I need you now.

Villarreal defenders, They surround me. Big submarines, All around me.

I get upset. Call my agent. I want money. I’m impatient.

Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

In case they get a hole in one!

What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."

Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?

On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!