Humor
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
What's the best part of having sex on a golf course?
The hole experience.
What do you call a guy whose hand is up a horse's butt?
An Amish Mechanic.
There were three Indians that got kicked out of the tribe.
One said, "Me find food," and he came back with a decent size rabbit. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see rabbit, me shoot rabbit, and rabbit fall down dead."
The 2nd Indian, "Me find food." He came back with a good sized deer. The other two asked him what happened. He said, "Me see deer, me shoot deer, deer fall down dead."
The third Indian said, "Me find food." He came back crawling, missing a leg and an arm, and he was all cut up. The others asked what happened. He said, "Me see train, me shoot train, train no stop!"
What did Tennessee do?
The same thing Arkansas did.
What do you call a Russian tree?
Dimitree.
Why did the blind man fall down the well?
He couldn't see that well.
What's the best thing about abortion jokes?
They never get old.
What's a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Lady fingers.
What is it called when a bull lies about other bulls?
Bullying.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
Is sex a joke? Because I don't get it.
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
What's the best thing about 28 year olds?
- There's 20 of them.
What's the best part of dating a homeless girl?
You can drop her off anywhere.
Dark humor is like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Did you hear about the guy who got a tattoo of an octopus?
He got inked up.
What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
Cha Ching.
My friend can't afford to pay his water bill anymore, so I sent him a card, "Get well soon."
God said, "Let there be light." Chuck Norris said, "You have to say please first."