Humor
Two wind turbines are standing in a field.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "Well... I'm a huge metal fan..."
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Don't worry, neither have they.
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
What do you get when you put a baby in a box of razor blades and throw it down the stairs?
An erection!
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
Guys go to this link......................................................................................https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/5b3937c1a328f6072c316bd6/hey-guys-who-wants-to-play-roblox-with-me-we-can-go-om-cool-maps-my-name-is-xx_robloxgamer420_xx-pleeease-lets-play-rol......................................................................and read it bum. Don't dislike cuz it'd retarded.
What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?
McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.
Why did Kayla go to the river when she was sad?
To drown herself.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
You give them a Sandy Hook.
You know, I got a SKELETON of these jokes. All are HUMERUS. Yeah, this gets under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening. Hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!
What's the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
One of them you'll see in a while, and the other one you'll see later.
I’m working on a good pun, but it makes no one laugh.
Why?
I don’t have a clue.
What do you call a mariachi band sinking in Mayonnaise?
Cinco De Mayo.
What's worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Theodore.
Theodore who?
Theodore is locked, that is why I knocked.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Apaches.
Apaches who?
Apaches on your eye.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Abajo.
Abajo who?
I have abajo of water with me.
Paddy's beautiful wife has not had an orgasm for the 15 years they have been married.
The doctor suggests that she may be overheating during sex, and a cool breeze may help.
Being a bit of a cheapo, he decides not to buy a fan but asks his friend Mick to waft a towel over them during the act.
After half an hour, still no sign of success, so his mate suggests swapping places. "I'll have a try, Paddy, you waft the towel."
Paddy agrees, and after two or three minutes, Paddy's wife has a moment of sexual pleasure, screaming in ecstasy for the first time in 15 years.
Paddy taps his mate Mick on the shoulder and says, "And that, Mick, is how you waft a bloody towel!"