Humor
Did you hear about the guy who invented the first knock knock joke?
He won the No Bell Prize!
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to.
He says to the first one, "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny."
He says to the second one, "You are addicted to food, you named your daughter Candy."
Then the third one whispers to her son, "Come on, Dick, let's go."
Two wind turbines are standing in a field.
One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The other says, "Well... I'm a huge metal fan..."
Have you ever had Ethiopian food?
Don't worry, neither have they.
Knock knock! Who's there? Deja. Deja who? Knock knock!
What do you get when you put a baby in a box of razor blades and throw it down the stairs?
An erection!
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
Guys go to this link......................................................................................https://worstjokesever.com/jokes/5b3937c1a328f6072c316bd6/hey-guys-who-wants-to-play-roblox-with-me-we-can-go-om-cool-maps-my-name-is-xx_robloxgamer420_xx-pleeease-lets-play-rol......................................................................and read it bum. Don't dislike cuz it'd retarded.
What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?
McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.
Why did Kayla go to the river when she was sad?
To drown herself.
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he didn't have the guts to do it.
How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
You give them a Sandy Hook.
You know, I got a SKELETON of these jokes. All are HUMERUS. Yeah, this gets under people’s SKIN, but I guess you could call their FUNNY BONE BROKEN! People try and hit me when this happens, luckily, I got THICK SKIN! Yeah, thanks for listening. Hope you got these puns down TO THE BONE!
What's the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
One of them you'll see in a while, and the other one you'll see later.
I’m working on a good pun, but it makes no one laugh.
Why?
I don’t have a clue.
What do you call a mariachi band sinking in Mayonnaise?
Cinco De Mayo.
What's worse than a bag of dead babies? One at the bottom is still wriggling.