Humor

AB💿

Dark humor is like pussy: whining bitches don't get it.

One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.

What is the coolest bath bomb for emos?

A toaster.

What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.

If someone told me to bring up 9/11, they were trying to make a funny joke, but it didn't work.

That one really *crashed and burned*.

By the way, why are there no knock knock jokes about America?

Because freedom rings, but they never answer that door.

Enjoy!

This is a short joke! This short joke is long. Nice joke, Mr. Steve.

How do necrophiles get consent? A ouija board.

Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?

Do you know pigeons die when they have sex?

I mean, the one I fucked died.

I didn't mean to call an Afghanistan hotline. I told them I was depressed, then they asked if I know how to drive a truck. I don't know how that has anything to do with it!

If things don't get better, the Christmas lights won't be the only thing hanging.

What's the difference between a dad and an Emo?

They both don't last a while.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

I did.

I did who?

You did a poo.

I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"

I KNOW IT'S MARCH, BUT I THOUGHT OF THIS!

Jingle bells, jingle bells! OH GOD, SANTA FELL!

I guess it's time for Mrs. Claus to go straight down to hell!

You're so flat, you make pancakes look thiccc.

In America, you fight Ukraine.

In Soviet Russia, you fight Mykraine.

I was trying to tell some people here to stop, but then I found out that the S was covered in blood from me assaulting someone.