Went home with a woman last night, I was greeted at the door by a Mongrel
I say Mongrel, it was her Downsyndrome Son trying to process if I was a stranger or not.
An optimist says, "the glass is half full." A pessimist says, "the glass if half empty." A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air." Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water."
What do you call a dog turd in China? Waste of food
What’s worse than running with scissors? Scissoring With the runs
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better then shouting he’s got a gun at the airport
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship? Neither one of them, they eat out
What do you do when a woman is choking?
Back up a couple inches.
Why did the dick go insane Someone kept messing with his head
Boobs are like friends you have big ones small ones real ones fake ones, but they all get taken out by cancer
What do you Call a guy that’s high in a wheelchair A baked potato
You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!
You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.
You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.
Stop with the 9\11 jokes. They're not gonna fly.
What does a white person say when there Surrounded by black guys? "hey who turned the lights out?!"
How do you make a snooker table laugh tickle its balls
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers in the world? Because they went through 90 stories in just 10 seconds!
What do you call a banana that can dance? CHUPAPIMUNYANYO BUISNESS
I'd make a 9\11 joke, but they always crash and burn.
