Humor
Why was 10 so scared? Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
I have no eye deer!
Roses are red, violets are blue, My name is Bucky, And I am stucky.
It's not incest if you're adopted.
What’s the difference between dark jokes and cotton?
Some people don’t pick it.
What comes after 69?
Period.
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button!
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”
A panic-stricken man explained to his doctor, “You have to help me, I think I’m shrinking.”
“Now settle down,” the doctor calmly told him. “You'll just have to learn to be a little patient.”
What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1.
My wife asked me the other day where I got so much candy. I said, "I always have a few Twix up my sleeve."
How do you break up a fight between two gay men?
Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
Why should you never make height jokes about dwarfs?
It goes right over their head.
What’s one thing you can say during a family dinner and in bed?
"Where are the kids?"