Humor

Why did the chicken cross the road? To cock-a-doodle die...

Women treat me like a god.

They ignore me till they need something.

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

Which country can swim?

Finland. Get it? Fin Land?

I thought God didn't make mistakes, but then I saw your face.

Lessi

These jokes are the bomb, I rate them 9 out of 11.

Me: "Cya"

Mom: "Where ya going?"

Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."

Mum: ...

Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.

Your hairline is so far back, it left before your dad.

I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"

I say, "Your parents."

Your hairline looks like it was drawn onto your head.

Why did Peter bring toilet roll to the party? Because he was a party pooper!

What has 148 teeth and🥴🥴 holding back a monster? My zipper.

Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!

What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite.

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.

Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!

What do you call a strong, independent girl in Haryana?

Dead.

I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.

I told a joke about miscarriage to a group of women, but none of them laughed.

I guess it was a bad delivery.