Hows jokes
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What record did Obama prove during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he'll still be in government housing.
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?
Tell him that it is a confessional booth.
How do you know when a fat person stops eating? You read about it in the obituary.
I’ve been munching away on these new Tic Tacs recently and honestly, they are really good.
It’s a little strange how they came in a bottle labeled “Ibuprofen” though, and really, I’m starting to feel a little sick. The bottle’s almost empty though, so it’s time to get some more!
It's true though
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS.
I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.
How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.
How do you turn a Chinese person into an American? Put a bag of ice on their eyes.
Why are orphans bad at basketball?
They haven't learned how to keep the ball with them.
Why can't orphans operate Apple devices?
Because they don't know how to use the home button.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.
And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.
How are Fortnite cards and orphans similar? They're given away.
Did you hear about the dwarf that had his wallet stolen? Just how low can you get?
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
Man: How do you prepare your chicken?
Waiter: Nothing special, we just tell them they’re going to die.
How to improve my beloved Penchester United in 5 easy steps:
1. Sell Casemeiro 🤑 2. Sell Pernandes 🤑 3. Sell Bencho 🤑 4. Sell Trashford 🤑 5. Terminate penaldo 🤑 6. Make Mctominay extend his deal 📝
These came down deep from my heart. Don’t let me down again, please.
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
How I Punch my Brother: Wooden Sword.
How he is telling Dad: Diamond Sword.
How hard my Dad is gonna punch me: Warden Punch.