Hows

Hows jokes

Record

What record did Obama prove during his presidency?

No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he'll still be in government housing.

Priest

How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.

Doctor

Doctor: I’m sorry, I can’t see you today.

Orphan: Oh, how about tomorrow?

Doctor: No, I can’t ever see you.

Orphan: Why?

Doctor: Because I’m a family physician.

Shot

How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?

He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.

Cat

This is how big cats were named.

"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."

"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."

Pregnancy

How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?

Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...

Midget

How do you piss off a midget?

Give them a yo-yo and tell them to play with it.