Hows jokes
How do you make an orphan shut up?
You tell his mom.
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how about you ligma balls? š (Itās all about how you pronounce the end.)
How to be a hero.
1. Tie a noose in your front yard.
2. Find and capture a furry.
3. Hang that furry because they deserve it.
Itās easy as 1-2-3!
My father taught me a lesson of sex in a hypothetical way.
My stepmother gave me a lesson [on] how [it] is going inside?
Dear Kenya, I am very sorry for how rude I was to you. I just want you to know that I'm on your side and I'll never do it again. - Sincerely, Gwen
Memes
You know how girls say, "I would have sex with you if you were the last person on earth"? Well, who's gonna stop me?
A delivery service called āRoss Deliveriesā was known to be the best in town. They never got anything wrong. One day, Rachelle got a delivery, but when it arrived, it was all broken! How is this possible?
I never said which delivery service she used. Lol.
How are the faster readers in the world?
9/11 victims, they read 80 stories in 10 seconds.
How do you spot an English man in Quebec?
A square head.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He didn't have enough room for any more RAM on his motherboard. I feel so bad for saying that!
How long is it?
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
How did they know the teacher onboard the spaceship had dandruff?
Cause her Head and Shoulders were everywhere!
How did pioneers name Canada?
They put a bunch of letters in a hat and pulled out three. The first one was "C, eh?" The second one was "N, eh?" The last letter was "D, eh?"
That's how they named "C, eh? N, eh? D, eh?"
How do we know the Ancient Egyptians were into organized crime?
They were always using pyramid schemes!
How do you give a woman from Alabama a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, nice tooth!"
I just overheard this but:
How do you make a party in space?
You planet.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.