Hows jokes

How do Asians name their kids? They drop spoons and forks down the stairs. Chin Chan Chon.

How did the guy greet his wife?

"Howdy, sister!"

This boy said, "Get your hairline straight." I said, "Girls don't have a hairline. How about you go to the barber shop and let your barber do your hair 10 times worse than he did the first time."

How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut!

Me: Are you an orphan?

Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?

Me: Where's your parents?

Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?

Me: Because it has a home button.

A man tried to attack me with milk and cheese—how dairy!

Sans: haha... Paps: what? Sans: i KNEW it was gonna rain today. Paps: that's nearly impossible, how? Sans: i could feel it in my bo- Paps: OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How are genders and twin towers alike? There used to be 2, but now it's a sensitive topic.

There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?

(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)

Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.

A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"

I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."

Bootylicious lol

I don't give two shits about how evil these are. They're funny.

Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?

Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.

And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like

Me: GUYS GUYS I CAN STOP 9/11.

My friend: How?

Justin: Justin!

I was in the Sahara Desert, dying of thirst. Thankfully, Pionel Pessi, the debut man, came to my rescue👨‍🚒. He brought in 100's of helicopters filled with bottles to quench my thirst. I asked him how he had so many bottles; "big games," he replied. Thanks for saving my life, my idol.

At 5 years old, I already knew how to throw paper airplanes thanks to my Arabian relatives!

How cool is NASA?

Not cool at all.

How do you get an orphan sad?

You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.

How do Chinese parents name their children?

Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.

How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.