Hows

Hows jokes

Mustard

How many thumbs down can this joke get?

Joke: Runescape, mustard, tits, Pamela Anderson.

Makeup

Girlfriend: I just lost 5 pounds!

Me: How many makeup wipes did you need?

Sheep

How do you f**k a sheep?

Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.

Memes

Documentary

I was excited to finally watch the new documentary on Netflix. It was about Pessi’s UberEats career.

In the trailer, Pessi delivered food to French farmers. I watched the documentary and got shocked when I found out how finished Pessi is. He delivered one Pizza in 44 attempts.

Corner

Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?

Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.

Milkman

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Milk man.

Milkman who?

Milk poooooooooooooooop peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep man!

Day

How's your day going?

Shut up, I didn't ask.

Use code tiko#teamfish

Death

How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.

Race

How did Stephen Hawking become a billionaire?

He won the F1 Wheelchair race.

Skeleton

Friend 1: How can the skeleton tell it was going to rain?

Me: He could feel it in his bones.

Friend 1: No, he read the forecast, you fucking idiot!

Heheh ;3

Chicken

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road and didn't make it.

Baby

How are babies and watermelons similar?

They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.

Poker

I aced my poker test...

My teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...

A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffin...

Do you get my puns? No, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...

Girl

I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.

I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.