Hows jokes
How cool is NASA?
Not cool at all.
How many feet are in feet?
How did Peter Cottontail get his swing on? He made love to Alice in Wonderland.
How to tell your kid is adopted? Hi Daisy, let's play a game called "You're adopted!" I will start: Your mum died so I had to adopt you, but don't think I love you because you were the only kid there, haha!
Q: How to hit an orphan?
A: Hit them with a family tree.
How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?
As soon as the bomb exploded on her.
The waiter asked me, "How would you like your steak?"
I replied, "As soon as possible!"
Me: I know how to use a microwave!
Also me: Mom! The microwave is on fire!
How does he go for a poo? He logs out.
Hey Explain bear, how would you like to be replaced by #ExplainNibbles the hamster AI?
How can a man make the world safer?
By having the chop.
How does water say hi?
It waves.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a power cut.
Hi, how are you today?
How do rappers keep their breath fresh?
With some FRESH BEATS.
How does a rapper keep track of time?
With his rhyming watch!
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.