Hows

Hows jokes

Pregnancy

Guy: Hi, how was your day today?

Woman: Good!

Guy: *Well I can’t ask her out cause she’s pregnant*

Guy: How many months pregnant are you?

Woman: What to you mean?!?! Also, I’m not pregnant.

Prison

How did the man in prison escape?

He drew a bum on the wall and slid through the crack.

Suicide

A man went into a library to get a book on how to commit suicide.

The librarian said, "No, you won't bring it back."

Mama

Yo mama so dumb, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!

Chick

How do fuck a really fat chick?

Roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.

Rubber

I'm not going bungee jumping. I was born by broken rubber, and that's not how I'm going out.

9/11

You know how 7 8 9? Why was ten scared? 'Cos he was in the middle of 9/11.

Coke

How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?

He CRACKed up.

Web

I need more webs and I need more supplies for more webs, how do I make them? With spiders!

Love

Gf: Babe, do you love me?

Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.

Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...

Bf: Exactly.

Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.

Alabama

You know how you mine and craft in Minecraft, and you chat in VR in VR Chat, but what do you do in Alabama?

Letter

Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy).

Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle).

Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what's the third son's name? A: David.

Unicorn

I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.

Tank

How many gears does a French tank have?

One forward and six reverse.

Basement

Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?

Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.