How do you make a lesbian upset Give her a multiplication test
How many gay guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one... But it takes the entire emergency room to take it out
do you wanna know how I recently seduced and obese woman, actually it was a piece of cake
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips? As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
How did you dad come back with the milk- the Milky Way
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on outings.
me: calls suicide hotline hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging
A cop saw an old lady carring two sacks. He asked the lady what she was doing. She opened one bag and shows a bunch of cash. "How did you get all this?" asked the cop. "Well, I live behind a golf course, and my backyard has many holes in its fence. Since there are no bathrooms nearby, the golfers stick their dicks through the holes and piss onto my hard, and that keeps killing my flowers. So, I grapped by hedge clippers, and when they stick it through, I grab their dick and yell, '10 bucks right now or it comes clean off!' After that nobody pees in my yard ever again." The cop responded with, "Dang. But what about the other bag?" She said, "Not everybody paid."
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day." Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"
How does the Next Train Stop for a depressive Person? Death
It funny how you feel so alone with depression and yet once you tell people on some random website so may people relate unfortunately it doesn't stop the loneliness
how to solve world hunger and over population?
cannabalism
Why orphans suck at Gta because they don't know how to be wanted.
How do you fuck a cow? Find the nearest karen
How to make a orphans hands hurt:make them clap their hands till their parent comes back
How long does it take for a depressed person to change a light bulb? 5 days. & I’m pretty proud of myself.
How much women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None,they just sit in the dark and bitch
I went to my sister room one day. I see a trophy, so I ask my sister how did you won this trophy my sister said to me the neighbors gave it to me because I gave out the best hand jobs in the neighbor. I guess my sister put her hands in good use.
How many baby’s does it take to paint a wall?
One if you throw it hard enough
