Howe jokes
How do you create the world's quickest human pyramid?
Turn on the gas chamber.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Well, it depends on how hard you throw them.
How do you restrain a straight person? Give them a straight jacket.
How do you restrain a trans person? Make the trans vest tight.
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.
How does a turkey drive a car? He wings it.
Memes
Son: Dad, I know I'm adopted.
Dad: Well, how do you know?
Son: I found the adoption papers.
Dad: That is for your mum.
If you know, you know.
Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.
Do trees pee?
How else do we have No. 1 pencils?
My entire family "TAKE THIS GIRL TO AN ASYLUM!!!"
Me "OH NO" 💀
What kind of club is every parent afraid of their kid joining?
The Mikey Jackson club.
How do you spell the name of the most dangerous pedophile?
M-I-C-H-A-E-L J-O-S-E-P-H J-A-C-K-S-O-N
me: calls suicide hotline. hotline lady: suicide hotline, how are you doing today? me: not much, just hanging.
Do you ever look at a person and think, "Just how many generations of inbreeding did it take to create you?"
Do you wanna know how I recently seduced an obese woman? Actually, it was a piece of cake.
How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?
As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.
How did your dad come back with the milk? The Milky Way.
It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.
When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don't find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on outings.
How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just sit in the dark and bitch.
how to solve world hunger and over population?
Cannibalism.
How does the next train stop for a depressive person? Death.
Girlfriend: "One day I will marry and a lot of men will be sad that day."
Boyfriend: "Wow, how many men do you plan to marry?"