I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend .
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes
Ooh I wonder whats on this browser *clicks* (how to tell your kid there adopted)
Jonny went fishing and he didn’t now how to cast his pole and he asked his friend joe how to cast it and then he cast he only cast 3feet and he never learned how to do it.
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How to astronauts have a party? They planet
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Why was the rapper always the life of the party?
Because they knew how to DROP the BEAT
Why did the rapper go to school?
To learn how to drop some KNOWLEDGE on his tracks
I found a book called How to Solve 50% of Your Problems. So I bought 2.
My Grandma as any other she got a APPLE IPHONE 12 but a we all know we get dumb and so we buy a phone my grandma did not even know how to use it she even said How do i go on google i told her YOU CANT!My grandma was yeah right how do i do it. Comment down below does you grandma do this?
When you're in a cage But it's not real!
Being in a cage But you have the key
Being in a cage But nobody sees you
Being outside of a cage- but it's empty
Living and realizing you've been born into one
Thinking someone cared about you But turns out they're toxic as fu**-
But you can't live without them.
The cage Is you. you have the key But you don't know how to use it.
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Free will is like having a vagina you don't need to know how to use it and you don't need to know what it does but what matters is that you have it.
Why do orphans not know how to play baseball Because they cannot find the home
How do you die from alzheimers? You forget how to breath.
How to Chinese people name their kids? - They roll down a coin down the staircase and it says, ching chang chong...
A man found out that he was going to die. A German doctor comes in and says “you have 10 more”. The man yells out “10 WHAT!! DAYS!!!! WEEKS!!!”. And the doctor says ”No seconds” and the man says “9 SECONDS!!!” And the doctor says “Nine Ten Seconds” He asked “How many seconds do i have to live 10,9 , or..........” Then he died and learned how to say no in German....
My friend said to me how to spell Tom and I said t o m m and he said that not how you spell it’sTom and he sese you have to take out 1m and he so I said but witch one
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Why cant orphans play baseball They dont know how to get to home.
