How To Jokes - Page 10 - Worst Jokes Ever

Relationship

How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.

FEW!!!!!!!

Forehead

Your forehead is so long, even Einstein didn’t know how to cross it.

Librarian

— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?

— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.

Ring

The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.

Psychopath

Hey, I’m George, and this is how to figure out if someone is a psychopath.

Go into someone’s search history, and find “Cuphead ship fanfic”.

Hey George, why do you have Russia x America countryhumans?

Memes

Chance

The image is a four-panel comic featuring a stick figure with a troll face. The first panel reads, "How to have a higher chance of winning in Russian roulette." The second panel shows the stick figure holding a pistol and reads, "Step 1: acquire a semi automatic pistol instead of a revolver". The third panel shows the stick figure holding the pistol and another stick figure with a concerned face and reads, "Step 2: tell your friend to go first." The fourth panel reads, "Problem death?" and shows the troll face again.

Trash

Say what you want about Jeffrey Epstein, but at least he knew how to take out the trash.

Friend

Jonny went fishing and he didn’t know how to cast his pole, and he asked his friend Joe how to cast it. Then when he cast, he only cast 3 feet, and he never learned how to do it.

Death

This is how to die soft 101.

Yo bro, you good? You need a hug?

Astronaut

How do astronauts have a party?

They planet.

Basketball

Why do people play basketball?

Because they want to learn how to suck balls.

Dog

I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.

He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.

Power

In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.

Plumber

Do you know how to make a plumber cry?

Kill his family.

Goldfish

How do goldfish know when to eat?

They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.

Adoption

Ooh, I wonder what's on this browser. *clicks* "How to tell your kid they're adopted."

Orphan

Why do orphans have phones?

Because they don't know how to call home.

Rally

How to silence a black protester at a rally?

TURN OFF THE LIGHTS, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS.

Book

I found a book called "How to Solve 50% of Your Problems." So I bought 2.

Solution

It's a shame Iran doesn't know how to restrain Israel. If only they had Hitler's expertise.

Now he really would be THE FINAL SOLUTION!

Rapper

Why did the rapper go to school?

To learn how to drop some KNOWLEDGE on his tracks.