How To jokes
Three strangers have opened a gay chat; but if one left the chat, the chat would be closed.
Stranger 3: How to turn a straight guy into a gay guy?
Stranger 1: You can't!
Stranger 2: You can.
Stranger 3: How?
Stranger 2: By using the same idea of the Russian experiment; like in a detention, put him in a closed room full of gay stuff, but the difference is that he can sleep, and he will have food for 30 days and a toilet, too.
Stranger 3: Great idea, but who can we try first?
Stranger 1: You all gays are evil monsters.
Stranger 2: I think the stranger 1 is just a straight spy. Let's try this experi-
(The chat has been closed by stranger 1)
How to get 1000 followers on Instagram?
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.
Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!
Why do orphans not know how to spell?
Because no one likes them, dumb people. 🤭🤡
What is one thing that a physicality handicapped gay man can do better than a heterosexual female or a bisexual female that are not born physicality handicapped? Know how to perform fellatio on a man that has a very long and thick and very large dick.
Chuck Norris gets paid $2 million a month training Bear Grylls how to survive in the “harshest conditions on earth.”
How to trick a gay man into having sex with a woman?
Take a dump on her vagina!
How to give a good hand job?
Bop it. Pull it. Twist it. Harder. Better. Faster. Stronger. You put your left hand in. You put your left hand out. You put your left hand in and shake it all about.
None of you ever touch my penis.
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian, and I know how to BAKE on breakfast.
2 jokes in a row babyyyyy!
What is the only thing lesbians know how to grow? Cucumbers.
I know how to cut down on Medicare expenses.
Lock Alzheimer's patients in dog cages when they misbehave.
Anyone know how to get an A on the "An Inspector Calls" section of the GCSE paper?
My mom showed me that she could deep throat a banana. I asked how you know how to do that. My mom said, "I practice on your stepfather."
How to get rich:
Step 1: Tell an orphan he will get a family.
Step 2: Knock out the orphan.
Step 3: Cut open the orphan.
Step 4: Well there [are] organs.
Step 5: Do it again.
And nobody will call the cops 'cause they got no family.
How do you die from Alzheimer's? You forget how to breathe.
The other day someone stole my mood ring. I don't know how to feel about that.
How to Make an Orphan cry
Step 1: Talk about Home.
Step 2: Ask them where their parents are.
Step 3: Say, "Bye Bye," and push them in the Batmobile!
Your Mom's Favorite Book, Chapter 1: How To Cook.