One day I got home and told my girlfriend "I cheated on you." she replied with "F**k you" I then said "But you won't, that's why I cheated on you."
Why is E.T. better than an orphan? Because he found his way home
what's an orphan's favorite movie Spiderman NO WAY HOME
A few kids were talking about how big there housed were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. 1 little boy said, bet I have the biggest home. To everyone's supprise he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
why cant orphans play baseball? because the cant make to home
If all your clothes where stolen, what would you go home in?
The dark.
2 boys came home for dinner late and their mother asked, "where have you boys been?" 1 of them replied with, "we were all over the neighborhood, we're mail men now." Their snobby teen sister said, "well your not real mail men, real mail men use real letters." Then 1 of the boys said, "actually we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."
Sometimes i wish my gf was here that way we could have some fun in my bed, the I realize she's right across the hall. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA)!!
What feature does an orphan's phone not have? A home button.
why cant orphans play baseball they don't know where home is
what type of work can orphans do. home work
What's the difference between an iPhone and and orphan.
One has a home.
Bill gets home from work late again, and Susan is angry. She hollars at Bill, "I AM FURIOUS. WHEN I GO OUTSIDE TOMORROW THERE BETTER BE SOMETHING THAT GOES FROM 0 to 200 IN 6 SECONDS". Bill Says, "Ok". The next morning there is a box outside! Susan opens it..It's a scale! Bill hasn't been seen since October 2, 2002.
What can you never tell an orphan? Go home to your parents.
A elderly woman and an elderly man were at a retirement home The man was shuffling a deck of cards for a card game The man asks "Is it your first time?" The woman replies "It's been a while since a man has asked me that."
This homeless lady called me ugly so I told her “ok then imma just go on home”
Why can’t orphanage kids play baseball??
Cause they don’t know where home is.
A guy is bankrupt so he gives his son a duck and tells him to go sell it for as much as he can.so the kid goes on the street to sell the duck. A prostitute walks by and says I'll f--ck you for $10. The boy says I would but I don't have any money. She says ok I'll take the duck instead. He says ok so they go up stairs and f—ck. The prostitute says that's the best sex I've ever had. I'll give you the duck back and we can do it again. So they do and he gets the duck back. But when they go downstairs the duck gets hit by a car. And the guy that hit the duck feels so bad that he gives the kid $25. So when he gets home his father asks him why he looks so tired. The boy says well I got a f—ck for a duck, a duck for a f—ck, and $25 for a f—cked up fuck.
What time is it when you get home can you walk walk home and walk