Home jokes
Orphans can't find the home page.
Dear Orphans,
I have a better orphanage for you. It's my basement :)
How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than 40 because my basement is still dark.
Yo momma is so fat, her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.
Why can orphans travel around so much?
A. They never get homesick.
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Why don't orphans do homework?
They don't have a home to do it in.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?
Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.
What did the dog say when he came home from a long shift at work? Today was ruff.
I have always hated stairs; they’re always up to something. 👻
I like Christmas.
It’s the holiday where an old man breaks into people’s homes so he can give them toys! :) yaaaaay 😁
Why did a Mexican go to Home Depot?
Because he thought it said "Home Deport."
Yo head so big I can skate on yo head.
I'm talking bout real real big, set a plate on yo head, charge a phone on yo head, build a home on yo head, studio wide, write a song on yo head.
How to make an orphan die?
Tell them to yell until their folks come home.
Dora, where do we go next?
Kids at home: Area 51.
Meanwhile,
Dora: Let’s go deliver the evidence to President Biden.
1 day later,
Dora: WE DID IT, HOORAY!
The mailman came to drop the mail off.
Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.
Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."
Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."
How many babies does it take to paint a room red?
Depends how hard you throw 'em.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
Why couldn’t the orphan run away from home?
Because it didn’t have one.
My Mrs is going to hit the roof when she realizes I've replaced the bed with a trampoline!